Of Guides and Hiccups

Well, it’s officially a month and three days until I leave San Francisco (again), for lands unknown (but first, lands very well known). I am (predictably) freaking out from time to time, testing my newfound coping skills and weathering the storms as best I can. Ah, Saturn Returns. You bitch. Despite all the changes that are happening, and the emotional hiccups, I feel like I’m moving forward. That was my takeaway from my dinner with Spencer tonight. It’s funny how friends you don’t see that often, people who are not part of your daily life, can have such an impact on you. Spencer is older, and much wiser, and is of the same writerly ilk. We have a great connection that means more to me than he probably knows, he’s the Virgil to my Dante if we’re gonna get literary (and melodramatic). Literally everything I say to him that I’m going through, or feeling, or worried about, or excited about, he’s already gone through. And he’s able to talk to me about it in a way that’s not condescending or preachy or anything, it’s just simply solidarity and gentle nudges in the right directions. We had a similar dinner about a year ago and I think I wrote similarly about it then. The content of those conversations is for me, but what I can share with the internets is that sometimes all you need is someone to tell you it’s going to be okay, even if it’s not okay.